All men should know how to speak. Being a good speaker is a first-class skill everyone must have. It will help you in any kind of relationships you build – being them with men or women.
The first point to work on is achieving a deep and commanding voice and how to calibrate the rest of your body – hands and eyes, especially- to perfectly match it. Second, you have to give good content and flavor to your speech, and to learn to tell anecdotes and stories is a great way of doing so. And finally, once the conversation is on track you have to keep the flavor going, continue building rapport and showing off your charisma until you finally close.
This last part is surely the easiest of the three. Imagine a situation like this: you charmed and made the girl you want have a great first impression of you and you are both having an excellent night. Nothing is guaranteed – but for sure you are in the right track. Yet, things could go wrong and usually go because men do simple, yet really foolish mistakes on the way. If you want to keep the flavor going, I suggest you sticking by some simple rules below.
Be positive – Always! This is the most important rule. Don’t talk about anything negative at all – keep everything you talk about positive. In fact, if you have any problems with family, work, money, university or whatsoever, don’t talk about them. If you do, just be brief and give a positive outlook about them. If she talks about her problems, don’t give her grim advice either.
Don’t talk about your ex – It’s a simple and well known rule, yet many men continue to do it. If you talk great things about your ex, the new girl won’t like it. And if you talk bad things about her, she won’t like it either. Better not to do it at all. If she asks about your past relationships, you can let her know but don’t go too deep into the subject. Never tell her how she mistreated you, dumped you, and cheated on you and so on.
Let her talk – In fact, she should be speaking much more than you do. Any girl’s favorite topic to speak about is definitely not you – nor is it politics, clothes, love or anything else. Their favorite topic is themselves. Even if you are dying to give your point of view about something, let her keep going. And remember the most important words you could say to someone when they are speaking about themselves: “That’s wonderful. Tell me more.”
Forbidden topics – Unless you are speaking with a very special kind of woman, you shouldn’t speak about politics, religion, violence or about any other topic that could offend her, her friends or otherwise bring conflict into the conversation. Also, make sure not to speak about subjects she might not know about or find terribly boring either. Boxing and role playing games, for instance, are not great topics for building rapport.
The list could be endless as there are dozens of mistakes men usually do when speaking with women. Stay tuned as this same article will be updated in the future!
RSS Feed or to our free 
Newsletter. And if you are not an native English speaker, perhaps you would like to help and translate this article into your language.Check Out These Related Articles:
What To Say On The First Date (2 Comments)
How To Pick Up Women At a Coffee Shop (4 Comments)
How to Become a Good Speaker (15 Comments)
The Chocolate Bomb – The Best Chocolate Cake (7 Comments)
First Kiss Tips (0 Comments)
{ 5 comments… read them below or add one }
moral of the story: always be fake, ’cause no one would ever love you for the way you are.
I’m sorry, but being the open, intelligent, real woman that I am, I would never go on a second date with a man who wouldn’t openly talk about politics, religion, and violence. No man (or woman, for that matter) should feel like they need to censor themselves in hopes of attracting a mate. Dating “rules” like this, which encourage a person to hide their true selves to impress someone is the reason that the divorce rate is so high. Theres only so long that a person pretend, and when they stop pretending their partner is often disappointed.
I think that both of you, James and Alex, misunderstood what I meant. By no means I want anyone who reads my site to hide their true selves. No way! You are what you are and that’s what makes you someone special. I don’t think anyone should change what they are and what they mean – But they can present themselves in a much better way. One way is to become a good speaker, as I wrote in the past article. That’s not being fake or being different, it’s improving and learning a skill.
These “rules” I wrote down here are what I believe will help you find a connection with someone in a faster way. They are valid for the first impression, not for the long journey that is a relationship. I love to talk about politics, history and religion and I do it with women, friends and everyone I meet. I wouldn’t go on a second date either with a girl who I feel I can’t talk about what I like.
But those things are just not, I believe, the best thing to talk about with someone I’m just meeting. If the other person would like to talk about it, I’m absolutely willing to.. But I think that we could enjoy more with conversations about their dreams, their adventures, their hopes and all those nice feelings.
Why would you want to be so serious upon meeting a girl in the first place? Keep it light and easy, have a great time, and all those serious discussions will naturally come up. I agree, it’s better to stay out of controversial subjects, and me personally, serious conversations right of the bat.
Moral of the story: become the person people want to talk to, and people will want to talk to you.
This is a great article and although you’d think most of the points made here would come naturally to most people, they don’t to everyone.